OM&M2: The Sequel  Revenge Of The Dog
by amongstbrokenwords
Summary: In high school we wrote this to take the piss, no offence intended. Strange themes, including a time-machine. Please don't judge me for this story.


**Hey, I was just flicking through my LiveJournal account and came across this lil' treasure. I wrote this back when I was 15 & in high school, with a couple of mates. We had to study of mice & men, and to be honest, I have never hated a book more in my life. It wasn't so much the book, but the way we had to analyse it, that has made me despise John Steinbeck beyond belief.**

**I remember sitting there with my two friends, at a computer, just taking the piss and doing literally no work. Together, we crafted this little beauty. In a way, it interesting to see how I (more than my writing style) have matured and changed since writing this, but y'know, we were bored, I was turning up to lessons stoned, it just wasn't a particularly good time.**  
**But I can still read this piece of whack and laugh at what a stupid kid I was. I've literally just copied & pasted, so any mistakes will still definitely be there - my apologies.**

**No offence is intended. If you like any of the people we completely & regularly insult, I'm sorry. We don't own any of these characters, and RE: the Sarah Palin/Heather Mills - we scripted this in simply because we hate Heather Mills & Sarah Palin, and because Sarah Palin seems to be of the homophobic ilk. I, myself, am bisexual, and intend no offence by making them "gay" or referring to them as "the lesbians". We were simply trying to pass the time until out next lesson.**

**I'd ask for reviews, but I'm pretty scared of peoples reactions... This is no great piece of literature. This is some drugged up teens views on how boring the lesson is.**

* * *

_**amongstbrokenwords presents  
**__**In co-operation with **__**midgigal **__& __**vixxie_x**__ (from livejournal)  
__**This summer...  
**__**The first was shit - this is even shitter...**_

_**OF MICE & MEN TWO! : Revenge of the dog!**___

_**Featuring...**_

- **George**, the depressed hermit who stalks his boss  
- **Lennie**, deceased at the end of the original, is now back with an army of "purdy things"  
- **Slim**, some big buff guy, who probably oil his muscles and flexes in front of a (shattered) mirror.  
- The old senile guy - **Candy **or something, I guess he likes sucking on lollipops  
-** Curley,** some douche who thinks his hard or something, but he's actually smaller than Midgigal  
- **Carlson**, some traitor-ing bastard, who just accuses people of stealing his gun *aka virginity*  
- **Crooks**, 50 cent in disguise, who's homies are on the warpath, and want some sweet white ass  
-** Curley's Wife**, deceased - she's the sweet white ass. Who said Necrophilia was dead!  
- Candy's dog, (**Scraps**), found the fountain of youth, and is now back alive, with a vengeance  
- **The Boss**, some guy who just like owns the ranch and shit. No-one gives a toss about him really.  
- **Whit**, just another geezer that might just appear if we can be bothered to write him in.

So you've met the dudes, lets hit the road!

Of Mice And Men: The Sequel™

_**Chapter One**__(written all together)__  
__**Vietnam - 1973**__**(yeah, time travel has been invented - get over it!, they have gone forward in time!)**_

Scraps reached for his automatic, and slowly blew the shit out of his surroundings. Body parts and guts and crap splattered everywhere, as he grabbed his bone, and settled down for a chew.  
"Bastards should know better, than to mess with my bone... they got what was coming to them." he grumbled under his breath.  
**(As you can tell, in our world dogs can talk and shoot you - watch out!)**  
As a Chenuke passed overhead, Scraps yawned and lay back, relaxing against his pile of corpses. Dirt circled in the air, and a book slowly blew past. He looked over , suspiciously, and slowly picked it up. As he turned to the first page he read the words aloud.  
"Of Mice & Men - John Steinbeck. What a fucking cunt. Trying to kill me off like that. Pah! that bullet in HIS kisser messed up that apparently intelligent brain of his. Wanker." he growled viscously. The ruffled grey fur on his back stood on ends, as his blood pressure rocketed.  
"How dare he kill me... I swear I will have revenge on him and all of those pricks who dares insult my honour. Arghhhhh!"  
Scraps holstered his handgun, and grabbed a nearby rifle, and slowly grooved off, to the bouncy tune of The Jackson 5's "I Want You Back".

** Salinas Valley - 1940**  
George's head span, as he dropped another empty bottle to the floor. He picked up his rake (randomly) and began tap dancing** (in the moonlight, everybody's feeling warm and right, it's such a fine and natural sight, whh- oh sorry, got carried away there!)**  
He slowly leant back against the cave wall, where he had been residing with Lennie's corpse for the last few years.  
3 years exactly since that fateful night. 1068 days exactly since he had killed the most important thing in his world.  
Lennie. His Lennie. His world. His constant. His touchstone. (**Okay, okay, I'm sory - i know I'm obsessed but if you recognise where those last four words are from I LOVE YOU! - amongstbrokenwords x)  
**Slim cautiously looked in the entrance. He was worried about the long term effects of isolation. **(Okay, enough X-File quoting for now! Sorry - amongstbrokenwords x)**  
"George.. .Hey George, are you okay?" **(Dumb question Slim, what are you mentally retarded or something.)**  
"It's - it's time..." George rocked himself back and forth, having dropped his rake and crouched next to Lennie's remains. **(God, it must stink in that cave. Rotting flesh - Yum! )**  
The sky darkened, and rain splattered to the ground. Slim stepped through the mouth of the cave, Crooks only inches behind him. Flashes of lightening drummed throughout the valley, as the evening sky roared it disapproval.  
"George? George, what do you mean it's time?" Slim asked inquisitively.  
"It's time..." was the only reply he received.  
He collected the earth from beneath his feet, and smeared it across his cheeks, anointing Lennie with a small dot on the end of his nose. He hummed deeply, and went to collect his rake, as Crooks and Slim, pressed themselves against the wall, frozen to the spot - too scared to stay, too scared to move.  
As George rose above Lennie's corpse, he threw open his arms and bellowed in a demonic voice.  
"The time has come Lennie. The time for you to return. I, George Milton, am here to witness these events in the name of the true lord Lucifer."  
Suddenly, the corpse started to writhe, flesh rejoining, blood being absorbed into the cells. George slashed across his palm with a razor sharp stone, and let the blood slowly fall upon his best friends heart, and it slowly began to beat.

Lennie's eyes flickered, as he slowly regained conciousness.  
"The rabbits George. Can I still tend the rabbits?" A grin broke across George's face as he leapt up from Lennie's side.  
"Yes Lennie. Yes you can tend the rabbits."  
At the back of the cave stood Slim & Crooks, eyes wide with disbelief. The darkness surrounded them, congregating the lack of faith in what they had just witnessed. A pall of rain crashed through the entrance, startling them all out of their reverie.  
"W-what, what just- Lennie?" Slim gasped.  
"Slim!" Lennie looked round happily. "Where are we George?"

**Chapter 2 ** (by amongstbrokenwords)**  
Sudan - 1939**

Sarah Palin cocked back her double-barrelled shotgun, and smiled to herself.  
Turning to her companion, she couldn't stop grinning. "Heather. Hey, Heather?"  
There was no response. "Oi, Heather Mills... Helloo? Anyone home?"  
Snapping out of the trance, Heather smiled apologetically.  
"Sorry, I was just thinking about that time my neighbours accused me of stealing one sock of their washing line... So, did you hit?"  
Sarah grinned even wider. "Did you every doubt me? Told you we'd have Moose for dinner!" **(Yes, they now have Moose in Sudan)**  
"So, this time travel thing..." Heather started.  
"The Tardis. Yeah, I bought it off that guy who looked like a chipmunk. With the scruffy hair and converse. Cute in a kinda gay man-way"  
"Oh yeah, so, like what happens if I meet people I already know... "  
"Like who" Sarah seemed confused.  
"Like, I dunno... Paul maybe..."  
"Why would you want to see that loser again..." Sarah hissed, clearly angered by such a preposterous idea.  
"Well, I figured, I managed to take him for everything he had last time, but if I meet him before I divorced him, he'd still have all that money & I could double my fortune..."  
"You know what Heather... I don't half fucking love you!" Sarah grinned, as she started to drag the downed Moose towards their camp.

**An Undisclosed Shelter in Area51 - 2009**  
"Why did we have to put fucking Heather Mills in guys?"  
amongstbrokenwords turned to midgigal & vixxie_x, "she's such a skanky bitch, y'know. We need to have cool people in like... yeah"  
"Well, we could always kill her!" midgigal grinned excitedly.  
"Ahhh, the benefits of writing about who you damn well please" vixxe_x sighed...  
"Yeah, but you know we could totally get sued for like, shit-loads of money, which may I point out WE DON'T HAVE; for like plagiarism, and what's that thing when people say you were bitching about them, and like they're really offended."  
"Don't be such a spoilsport amongstbrokenwords. Besides no-one knows what the fuck we're on about. Hell, we don't know what the fuck we're on about..." vixxie_x replied.

"Slander!" amongstbrokenwords yelled. "We could be fucked for slander!"

The other two girls looked at each other blankly.  
"Oh- oh I have an idea..!" midgigal bounced up and down on the desk. "I know..."  
Pushing amongstbrokenwords away from the keyboard, she typed furiously...  
"Hello Area51!" Matt Bellamy strode to the front of the mysteriously appearing stage, "Tonight are we going to put on a show for you!"  
Lighting rigs appears and speakers started blaring out the intro to "Time Is Running Out"  
"The benefits of writing about who you damn well please!" midgigal cheered.  
amongstbrokenwords looked pensive, as she sparked up yet another joint... "Now why do I seem to think I know that saying from somewhere..."  
"Well, if you're going to do that..." amongstbrokenwords shoved midgigal to the floor, and sat back at the keyboard.  
*Tip-tap-tip-tap* The keyboard rattled loudly. "Why the fuck did we stop using type-writers.." midgigal muttered under her breath.  
"A-HA! " She announced with a flourish and a breath of smoke, as she smashed down the return key.  
"I present to you..."  
Suddenly a trapdoor appeared in the ceiling, and Mulder & Scully crashed 20ft to the ground...  
"Ow... what the fuck Mulder... what happened?" Scully jumped to her feet & aimed her weapon at  
the 3 teenagers sat at the computer.  
"Scully, Hey Scully, I think we're in Area51" Mulder jumped up excitedly, and started to canvas the room.  
amongstbrokenwords leaned over to her companions... "Voila!" she whispered.  
In the background Muse played on regardless of the situation...  
"Our next song, and I want you all to sing along, yes, you know the one... it's SUPERMASSIVE BLACK HOLESSSSS!" Matt screamed!

**Chapter 3**** (By midgigal)****  
SALANIS VALLEY 1945  
****  
**It had been 5 years since George had re-awoken Lennie. His Lennie His muse. His touchstone.  
However, sometimes events can take an unnatural turn. Lennie's idiocy had already cost 7 people  
their lives. On the good side, 5 of those were girls aloud.**(do you like that amongstbrokenwords?)** On the bad side, one of the other victims was The Boss, which meant Curley (The Boss's son) had once again decided to track down Lennie. Lennie had already been running for miles once George caught up with him.  
" Lennie slow down". George said ( this is rather surprising since Lennie is about 3 times the size of  
George)  
Lennie came to a halt and waited for George to catch up.  
" I did a bad thwing gerowge. I killeded the Boss" Lennie replied once George was by his side.  
" I know Lennie, that why we gotta get you away. Fay away. Somewhere we can hide where they'll never find us." George replied to his companion  
" Can we go to neverland, like in the book?"  
" Neverland? Lennie I know you're dim but come on! You know it's not real!"  
The two continues jogging deeper into a forest, hoping not to be seen, George still amazed at how dim Lennie could be...

**AREA 51, NEXT TO THE AUTOPSY ROOM, 2009**

midgigal, Vixxie_x and amongstbrokenwords had been staring wide eyed at Mulder and Scully for around 45 seconds now,

Supermassive blackhole was still blaring out in the background.

" So, could you please tell us why you're using a Government laptop to write..." Mulder leaned towards the laptop to see what they had been doing... " Of mice and men 2?"  
He turned towards the three.  
" We hated the first so much we decided to write a crappy sequal" amongstbrokenwords explained  
"It **IS** a horible book" agreed Scully. " Even us Americans had to read it, it's been read for centuries. The Government believes it was plot BY John Steinbeck to rid all the world of any enjoyment from reading. There's even been an official investigation into just how he managed to create it. But it's all government official stuff."  
midgigal's interest grew with the knowledge she'd been given. " Like, super secret stuff?"  
"Well obviously midgigal" Replied vixxie_x, who was back at the laptop, and beginning to write about Neverland for some unknown reason.  
"We can't tell you anymore, we just think it would be best if you left now." Mulder began, but was interrupted by the television...

" **BREAKING NEWS! **Today Boris Johnson was killed by a dog, IN A WAR PLANE!  
There has currently been no explanation as to how the dog got there or how it can ride a plane, but  
local witnesses say it's looks like the one for "Of mice and men" by John Steinbeck. The dog was seen  
around midday going over the skies, and hit Boris with at least 123 gun bullets, and one missile, leaving more than 20 others dead. There is also a massive wreckage just outside parliament where the missile hit.  
Panic has hit the streets many believing it to be Al-Qaeda once again, many believing that the dog is working for them.  
But for now people are hosting street parties, in the wake of Boris' death. This is some generic news reporter, good day."

"It can't be. we wrote in our book that he came to life in Vietnam. Does that mean we're part of the story as well?"  
amongstbrokenwords replied.  
" I don't know I'm confused" vixxie_x said.  
midgigal looked around..." I don't care i still need to write Heather Mills and Matt Damon dying!"  
She perched herself by the computer and began to write...though stuck for ideas still...

**WASHINGTON,JANRUARY 1946.**

George and Lennie had been hitch-hiking for a few months now, going all over the country. They'd spent Christmas in California, but had to go once they'd heard Curley was on his way. Now, dirty and tired, the New Year had just been welcomed and the pair scrambled out of a fruit van.  
George looked around; it didn't look like it had in the pictures. There were a lot of slums and filthy streets, the recent war with Germany and Japan had cost a lot of money. Staying on the farm meant that Geroge and Lennie were away from all that and had never really seen the full impact. To them the war meant they had to produce more farm produce to send to those out there fighting. They'd never imagined that this was what it had caused.  
" Right Lennie, did you get some fruit?" George asked.  
The pair had been making their way by selling small things they found and stealing anything they could.  
" I got 3 apples and a bunch of grapes" Lennie answered, seeming triumphant at his achievement. Lennie had only ever stolen a banana before, and he got caught for that one. The pair had to clean up the owners stall as punishment, so this was a big achievement.  
Despite its filthy surroundings, George couldn't help but notice that Washington was not short of attractive women.  
George noticed one woman in particular who wore red from her hat to her heels. She had sun-kissed blonde hair and a slim figure.  
He approached her, hoping to get information on where the nearest cheap hotels were so that he and Lennie could get some rest.  
The pair usually had to sleep on hard ground or hay stacks. A warm bed would make a nice change.  
" Excuse me ma'am, my name's George. Me and my friend Lennie here were wondering if you would be so kind as to show us where a good Hotel is?"

Lennie noticed her blonde her, he imagined how it would feel just to get a stroke...then he noticed her prosthetic leg, which freaked him out a little, then he went back to her hair.

"Yeah sure, there's a few right down there. You can call me Heather. Heather Mills. That'll be $500 for directions please."  
The pair realised once again who she was, and remembered the story they'd been told about her and Sarah Palin in Sudan. They were the lesbians! Lennie & George decided...

**AREA 51, 2009**

"MIDGIGAL!"  
amongstbrokenwords' shout was so loud the ginger midget fell out of her seat.

"You stopped me writing mid-flow. Heather's Mills' death was gonna be amazing!" midgigal replied, a little peeved at being interrupted.  
"Heather mills?" questioned vixxe_x. " But she wasn't even born then".  
" Screw continuity! I just wanna kill her!" midgigal yelled, more and more pissed off by the second.  
They all agreed that was fair enough.  
The reason midgigal had been interrupted was because of some rather great news. Mulder and Scully had decided that they could help them stop John Steinbeck. If the three were smart enough to find and get into Area 51, they were smart enough to be of help. amongstbrokenwords was ecstatic at this idea, having been in love with Mulder & Scully for many years. Maybe she could even script in a little ménage à trois. Both vixxie_x and midgigal were pleased, it would keep amongstbrokenwords content for years, although midgigal still wished to get back to her story, She hadn't even introduced Matt Damon yet...

When the time came for them to get the first flight to London, midgigal took the latop so she and the others could continue writing the story. After all it had to be finished somehow...

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**Once again, my apologies for posting this. It has no place on . But someone just linked me to a spoof about Hitler & Jesus, so I figured, if someone can post that, I might as well post this!**  
_**Keep Cool x** _


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